34 weeks

Well, the bp has been running 130-40's/80-90's all weekend, with an occasional 120/80something reading. This morning, straight waking bp was 156/96, and after 5 minutes was 146/92. I had a headache over the weekend, but it wasn't the migraine-like headache. I'm a bit swollen today, and in general feel crappy.

My blood pressure was high at my appt this morning (152/92), but did lower after lying down (118/76). I'm showing protein in my urine (+1). I'm showing protein in my urine, but nothing significant at this point to warrant induction. As my OB puts it, things are brewing. They're just not enough to deliver at this point. With preeclampsia, things could "brew" like this for two more weeks, or could turn on a dime and get worse quickly. So, he is stepping up the monitoring to watch for any further changes. I am a fingertip dilated and my cervix is soft.

I have BPP's done once a week now. I also start NST's this week. I have lab work done about every three days, so we are covering all bases. And I see my OB once a week at least. With the NST's I see the nurse for a bp and urine check.

It's great we can monitor things like this, but it does add up in the schedule. I'll be at the clinic or the hospital at least 3 times a week until baby comes. While we are hoping for at least another week, it stinks to keep waiting for things to happen. I'm still optimistic (somewhat) that I can hold out for another 2-3 weeks, but we truly are just waiting for me to get sick. With talking with other preeclampsia survivors who are pregnant again, we have a different way of going through another pregnancy. We all hope for the best, but need to be prepared for the worst. Our reality is different. As Jason said it this morning to the OB, "ignorance is bliss." With Ariana, we had no idea what was happening. With Phoenix, we do and we just have to wait. Wait to maintain things, wait to get sick, etc.

I think some of my difficulty with this is that Ariana's birthday is Wednesday. Three years ago today I didn't know what HELLP was, didn't know that I'd be having a baby in 72 hours, etc. I cherish the memories, but hate them as well.