ARGH!

So, we have a new desktop as our laptop has basically gone to the shitter. And the desktop has Vista, of course. Well, when I upload my photos from my camera it was automatically using Adobe Photoshop to load them. I thought nothing of it and just made sure I had them going to the correct file location. Well, last evening I discovered that all the video I had taken over the last month or so is gone. As in, never copied over from the camera. Apparently, because I have Photoshop Elements and not the Premiere edition it doesn't handle the video files. And I of course, never checked it and was deleting the files off my camera after I'd copy them to the external hard drive.

The video I took of the kids at the park yesterday is the one that made me lose it. I cried. Yep, I cried.

Jason is working on it, but there seems to be some glitches. I have always used Kodak software that came with my camera, but Vista isn't liking it too well. Even with the downloaded install on their website.

So for now, I need to remember not to delete video files. ARGH!!

A Day at the Park

You Are My Sunshine

Oh my, you are growing so fast. She has this personality that just sparkles. She loves to be silly.

My buddy

Phoenix is my buddy. While he may say "dada" all day long, he is more of a mommy's boy. He doesn't snuggle a whole lot, so when he does it makes it that much more awesome.

Splish Splash

Here we are splashing in puddles the other evening. The kids were having a blast.

Sleeping Child

She's so peaceful when she sleeps.

Moving Book

I recently finished this book Do They Hear You When You Cry. It took me a few chapters to get into the book, but once I did I didn't want to put it down. The book is about a young woman who flees her home in Togo, Africa just hours before she is to undergo female genital mutilation (FGM). In her tribe, arranged marriages and FGM are common. The ritual of FGM is something a girl cannot refuse.

The book details her story as she leaves Africa and makes her way to the United States to seek asylum, only to be locked up in prison. Fauziya's journey is moving and heartwrenching as well as inspiring.

Moonlight Dancing

Wednesday night the moon was shining with all it's brilliance. Ariana was fascinated by it. As we left my inlaws, she asked if the moon would follow us home. And to her delight, the moon indeed followed us. I asked her to join me outside where we danced in the middle of the road together. It was so beautiful.

Blah

I'm still in a funk this week. I've got things I'd like to write about, but things are not flowing like they usually do. Hoping this will pass soon.

C-Ya Later!

I'm heading out for the weekend, and I am so looking forward to it. It's time for our annual Passporter Mall of America meet. This is the 6th year we've gotten together, and I've made each one. There's friends, good food and drink, scrapbooking, and of course, Disney talk! Mom and I are making a stop at Ikea as well this weekend, in addition to a few other stores.

Out of sorts

I feel rather out of sorts lately. Not even sure how to put it into words.

Lil' Fan

Jason is watching the beloved Packers play at the moment, and he's got his lil' Packer fan cheering with him. Ariana is repeating everything he says. "False start" "Move 'em back" "Come on Pack" It's just too darn cute. She keeps singing "Green Bay Packers" intermittently as well.

Just add hair

This is a photo of hobbit feet. See, all I need is to grow some hair on my footers and I could be a hobbit.

Worry

You never stop worrying about your children. That is what I've heard from countless parents. Parents who are grandparents, or great-grandparents now. Your children are always your children, no matter how old they get.

And there is always something to worry about it seems.

Our latest worry with Ariana was how she'd adjust to school. She had been talking about going to "big school" all summer and couldn't wait. She typically has no issues meeting new friends and only once in a while is shy. Well, her first week was full of shyness. She'd jabber about school all morning and even walking the hallway to the classroom. The minute we'd get to the door, she'd turn shy. I was exasperated. Each day she cling to me and tell me she was scared. The teacher would have to take her by the hand and lead her away. It broke my heart, but also made me worry about why she was doing this. I would watch her through the window after we'd separate and she'd be fine. After class, she's burst from the room and tell me all about the fun things she did that day. Well, this week is going much better. The last three days, I've had to ask for a kiss or hug before I left. She was much too excited to leave me for her friends on the playground and that wonderful slide. As I'd walk away, she'd yell "Bye, mom!" I knew it was nothing to worry about, but I still worried anyway.

The other recent thing with her was this awful hitting spell we went through over summer. In late June, she started hitting herself when she was upset with herself or mad that she was being disciplined. It was awful to watch, and I tried so many different things. July it worsened. I talked with Ariana about how it scared mommy when she did this, how she could hurt herself, we created an "angry" pillow, etc. I made an appointment with the pediatrician who basically told us we had tried everything she would have suggested, so she referred us to a behavioral therapist. Great, just what every parent wants to do, right?

We saw the therapist who suggested Ariana has issues with low self esteem. My kid? The one who tells the grocery store clerk about her day? The one who rarely shies away from others? On one hand I was confounded by this, but then after I thought about it I could see it. When it comes to her own self, she is becoming a perfectionist. If the line isn't straight on the drawing, she gets very upset and rips up the paper. I have tried so hard not to let my perfectionist tendencies (I'm much more relaxed in the last 10-15 years) pass along to her. But this is who she is. And we just want her to be the best person she can be. In the long run, the therapist (and us) thinks she was acting out due to the stress levels in the home. You see, after we paid $150 for 45 minutes with the therapist the first time, Ariana only hit herself once. And she's only done it maybe 2-3 more times since. July was an awful month for us and Jason & I were so stressed. Major things were happening that this little 4 year old couldn't understand. All she knew was that mommy & daddy were acting different than normal. There were (and are) issues with discipline between Jason & I that are being resolved. Mainly, one of us is the disciplinarian and the other lets things slide. The consistency between the two of us was pretty nil. That had to change.

So, long story short. We were worried, and rightly so. There was a problem and we needed to work to resolve it. As parents, I figure it's our job to continually grow and learn how to help our kids be the best people they can be. And how to best work with their quirks and temperaments. Since we've had her, I've learned how not to worry about some things. I try not to worry about major things until someone tells me to worry. But it's a daily battle. And one I think most parents can understand.

Loss

It's been one year and you are not forgotten.

Never Forget

Zoo Gathering

We traveled to Madison yesterday for our zoo outing with the Preeclampsia Foundation families. I made a squidoo page about it. FYI, squidoo is a neat way to create awareness and fundraise.

Check us out: Zoo Outing

Happy Birthday Jason!

Jason has a birthday today! Happy birthday love!

Sisterhood

Tomorrow I will be spending some time with my preeclampsia sisters. We are having a family get together at a zoo, and it's sure to be an adventure with all those little kiddos.

These women are survivors. We come from all walks of life and have had different experiences within the PE realm. But preeclampsia is the common bond we all share. Each story is unique and valued. We can express our feelings and concerns about pre-e related things to each other in a way that we can't to other individuals.

I would have loved never to have experienced preeclampsia. But, I did. I found these incredible women and I treasure the bond that I have forged with them. I draw strength, wisdom, and humility from each of them. I love my PE Sisters.

the laughter

My son's laughter is so wonderful. He has this grin and then the dimples come out. Follow that up with the cutest giggle. He thinks so many things are funny; jumping on our bellies after dinner, pulling his sister's hair, lifting up his shirt for us to find his belly button. There is just something about his laughter that is magical.

Music

It was music to my ears the other day. I picked up Ariana from school and she ran out, gave me a huge hug, and said, "I missed you, mommy."

First Day of Big School

Ariana had her first day of "big school" today. She starts 4yo kindergarten this year. After preschool last year, she's pumped and ready to go! She didn't want me taking all sorts of photos, so I snapped these first two and then was told to knock it off. ;) (Mom, the papparazzi) I got a fun photo of her cheesy smile after school and included a photo of one of her art projects today. The big highlight was snacktime where she had chocholate milk and a cookie. They sang a song about a crocodile and a monkey, and got to play outside.





My little girl is growing up. We are so proud of her and of who she has become so far. This little girl has opened our eyes to behold new experiences with a child's view. To find delight in the clouds, the bees buzzing in the flowers, and so much more. I hope she stays true to herself as she grows up, and follows all of her dreams into the stars. To dance to music even if others cannot hear it. To sing without abandon so the angels can hear her voice. I hope she believes in herself and that she can do anything she sets her heart and mind to. And I hope she knows and remembers that she is always loved.

My baby girl is growing so fast.

Happy Labor Day

Here is a link to an explanation of Labor Day. I found it quite interesting:
Labor Day

From the website:
"Labor Day differs in every essential way from the other holidays of the year in any country," said Samuel Gompers, founder and longtime president of the American Federation of Labor. "All other holidays are in a more or less degree connected with conflicts and battles of man's prowess over man, of strife and discord for greed and power, of glories achieved by one nation over another. Labor Day...is devoted to no man, living or dead, to no sect, race, or nation."

Labor Day, the first Monday in September, is a creation of the labor movement and is dedicated to the social and economic achievements of American workers. It constitutes a yearly national tribute to the contributions workers have made to the strength, prosperity, and well-being of our country.

Good Times

We spent the day with our good friends, Dawn & Eric and their kids. We met up at Bay Beach and enjoyed the sunshine. Ariana and Greydon were peas in a pod. We don't get to see the Brown's too often, so I was estatic to spend the day with them.